
I don't believe a word of it!!!
1. Contrary to what we preach - we don't actually spend as much quality time with the kids as we let on. Instead of doing the museums on a rainy day, we're more likely to use the inclement weather to embark on feverishly bidding on eBay while the kids watch the telly.
2. Because there are so many rainy days in England, in truth our children watch at least three times more TV than we admit to, and it's rarely educational, unless you count watching Rupert Penry-Jones on Jackanory Junior - which we find very stimulating.
3. We can sometimes only make it to 5pm before we need an alcoholic drink. Or we tell ourselves we'll be good 'till hubby gets home from work or when the kids go to bed, whichever is earlier.
4. We sometimes multi-task while having sex. So while the father of our children is focused on exquisite love-making, we can't stop ourselves from compiling mental lists. These include: meals you can make out of cauliflower before it goes bad; holiday destinations we can't afford, and TV cops we'd sleep with if our lives depended on it. DCI Gene Hunt - you know who you are.
5. If we could go on holiday by ourselves we would, but half the time we're not the only one who is paying for it, so we feel obligated to take the wage-earner (and offspring) along.
6. While we're with the four-year-old watching Dr Who, we're secretly fantasising about being his assistant.
7. We say we're working or catching up on emails when we're really on Facebook messaging old boyfriends and updating our status with a pithy aside. This is to ensure that old amours never discover our day off is sometimes spent slumped in front of Dickinson's Real Deals while the kids are at school.
8. Sometimes if it weren't for the kids, the dual incomes and the fact that there is someone else to take out the bin from time to time, we'd be sorely tempted to book a month's worth of babysitting and start dating again.
9. Hair. We've got lot more than we let on and not in a good way. In fact, much of our "leisure" time is spent bleaching/plucking/shaving and removing it by any means possible.
10. When we say that we really must go take kids to the theatre more often, it's usually because we've heard that David Tennant is doing Hamlet. Ditto if we choose to go (without them) to see a film with overly lofty aspirations. Let's face it; would you really want to see Revolutionary Road if it didn't star Leo and Kate?
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