Challenging Clients 2

Resource: Executive Coaching with backbone and heart: Immediacy – behaviour in the coaching relationship reflects their life skills.

Backbone behaviour: Ask how the coachee benefits from inappropriate behaviour and what is the cost? Challenge = stretch

People’s inappropriate behaviour in the coaching relationship will probably be very prevalent in the rest of their life, in fact amplified.

3 levels of coaching

1. Skill
2. Performance – doing the skill better
3. Developmental coaching – introspective, helping people see inside of themselves, being a mirror: Questions that has the coachee stop and think before being able to give an answer

Introspection: To know who we are… be careful not to dig too quickly

Widen your perspective by exposing yourself to different things.. books, courses, people etc

Growth comes from challenges, pain, where there is resistance.

Resource: A course in miracles foundation

Think of one situation where you are being challenged now. How can it be managed to make a positive experience for all?

Challenge: my finances

Management:

Ask myself what’s the worst thing that can happen
Reframing: Money isn’t that important

Look back at what was the cause or basis of a situation where I’ve had to deal with difficult people or challenging situation

A peer has had an agenda which she has taken to a boss and without consultation it becomes policy.

When have I been the challenging client? How did I feel and why did I react the way I did, what did I learn?

I had spent a week preparing for a major presentation. On the morning of the presentation my immediate boss ran through my presentation. There was one area which he wasn’t convinced about. He asked me to work it out for myself. I offered a number of possible changes but he persisted in saying that I hadn’t identified the issue. I responded by telling him I had run out of ideas / solutions. However, he still wouldn’t advise of the necessary change. The minutes were ticking away and I became increasingly frustrated, stressed and angry. I ultimately walked out of the office not wanting to continue the process. I believe he needed to make some suggestions to give me some roadmap to the answer. I learnt that I need to preplan my response to such situations.